eatvancouver.net

THREATDOWN

by Daniel Fishman
Eat Vancouver Writer
Sunday, June 24th, 2007

Well Vancouver diners, it’s that time again, time for us to keep you up to date on all the threats to enjoyable dining we are facing in Vancouver right now. I know you probably won’t be able to fall asleep tonight, but this is no time to back down. If we stop making up reasons to be afraid, then the terrorists win. So without further ado, let’s get on with it:

#5. Bad service.

Nothing new about this one, but it bears mentioning again. Some places in town seem to think that it’s acceptable to have servers who know nothing about the menu, to seat groups too close together, to make diners wait forever for their food, or to provide dirty glasses/plates/silverware. On the other hand, I have had some good luck lately with good service. Standing out are Indian Flavours and Swiss Chalet—nothing like a well-trimmed bird.

#4. Sushi.

Alright, there’s nothing particularly scary about sushi, but here’s the problem: with so many sushi places everywhere, it’s hard to tell the difference between the good ones and the bad ones. And you really don’t want to risk bad sushi. Plus all these sushi places seem to have convinced people that Vancouver has a “diverse” restaurant scene. But how about some good Mexican? Some good BBQ? I could go on…

#3. Overcooked burgers.

I suppose an undercooked burger has the potential for a scarier outcome, but wouldn’t we rather risk having our burgers a little undercooked as opposed to be guaranteed that they will be dry and tough? If restaurants took some responsibility for grinding their own meat, perhaps we could change the ridiculous laws that ensure that pretty much every burger I have in this town feels like a mandible workout.

#2. Bad wine lists.

How often do you look through a restaurant wine list only to find the same tired BC pinots, merlots, and Australian reds? In the thousand miles from here to Santa Barbara lie some of the most diverse, interesting, and exceptional wineries in the world. And you are telling me this is the best we can do? Even at places that call themselves wine bars its unlikely you will find anything you couldn’t pick up at the BCL (though you probably wouldn’t want to). And another thing, what is with the service temperatures in this town? Red wine should not be served at room temperature if the temperature of your dining room is nearing 70 degrees; half of the time red wines in Vancouver taste more like they have a shot of vodka in them. And white wine shouldn’t be served straight out of a 40 degree fridge! Give me a break.

#1. Yuppies.

There’s really nothing scarier than the Urban Professional, although, let’s be honest, with a lot of these hipsters we see in Vancouver “Young” is a bit of a stretch. But the real threat that the Yuppie poses to the average diner is his obsession with trends. No wonder we are faced with so much repetition, from tapas bars, to sushi bars to wine bars that all feel pretty much the same. The yuppie would seemingly rather spend her disposable income at the right “kind” of place, leading to a “bear market” dining landscape that lacks imagination. How else to explain a creative, interesting place like Lucky Diner lasting but a few short months? I mean, it wasn’t my favorite place in the world necessarily, but at least it was original. Hopefully, this trendiness trend will be over soon…